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OUaT S4E3 – “Rocky Road”

…Is that an ice cream pun in the title of this episode?

You butter(pecan) believe it!

ouat-icecreammagic

Ahhhhhhahahahahaha, I’m delightful.

Okay, so I had this whole post written out when a power thing managed to erase it because, apparently, auto save didn’t want to work… I’m still bitter.

So let’s delve right on into a synopsis.

Read the rest of this entry

TWD The Walking Recap – S4E13 “Alone”

Last night’s episode was pretty well tied together. I enjoyed it much more than last week’s (sorry Beth fans), and it actually featured two sets of survivors rather than solely on one group for the whole episode, so that’s a step in the right direction, in my opinion.

The episode opens, like so many have in the past, in the past. Bob Stookey is wandering alone and we see several simple yet dramatic shots of how he has survived by himself for so long.

Like this one:

Which really doesn't look all that stable, despite it resourcefulness.

Which really doesn’t look all that stable, despite it resourcefulness.

 

And this one:

Legit.

Legit.

 

Eventually, the roar of an obnoxiously loud motorcycle heralds the arrival of a redneck and his token Asian companion, and Glenn and Daryl ask Bob their “Three Questions,” ultimately bringing him into the group, as we all well know by now. Bob’s answers?

1.) He’s killed dozens of walkers.

2.) He’s killed one person.

3.) It’s because she asked him to.

Hm. Wonder if "she" is important to his past, or if we'll ever learn more about her.

Hm. Wonder if “she” is important to his past, or if we’ll ever learn more about her.

 

After the opening credits roll, we get a nice, spooky scene wherein present day Bob, Sasha, and MAggie are standing back-to-back-to-back, fending off walkers in a fog so dense that visibility is down to a mere one to two feet in front of them.

Why would you not just climb a tree when the fog rolls in and just wait for that shit to roll right back on out?!

Why would you not just climb a tree when the fog rolls in and just wait for that shit to roll right back on out?!

 

Every walker attack is sudden, and things don’t look so good when Bob appears to have been bitten. Sasha takes out the walker.

1 bullet.

1 bullet.

 

Then Maggie has a really tough time with one, and Sasha saves her.

2 bullets. Also, Lauren Cohan makes the BEST faces on this show. ALL of the teeth are bared ALWAYS.

2 bullets. Also, Lauren Cohan makes the BEST faces on this show. ALL of the teeth are bared ALWAYS.

 

Luckily, that’s the last of them, and the two gunshots didn’t attract more walkers, AND the walker that bit Bob bit him over the bandaged bullet wound, and his bandages are made of fucking Kevlar, and the man is fine, because there are three episodes left in the season, and they don’t want to murder everyone and ruin all of our lives just yet.

Sasha is super psyched that he’s not going to turn, hugs him, then pulls away when it hurts his shoulder, and they all share a happy little laugh because adrenaline is a funny thing.

Cut over to Daryl and Beth, where Daryl is actually making good on his promise from last episode (yawn) to teach her how to shoot a crossbow.

Legit.

Legit.

 

He’s also teaching her how to track, and she’s able to reason that it’s a walker, which they soon happen upon, and then she decides that the best way to kill it with a crossbow is to sneak up on it because distance weapons aren’t specifically used from afar and you need to be in close proximity.

Naturally, she twists her ankle by getting it caught in, like, a miniature bear trap our something, the walker hears, she hits it but in the jaw, and Daryl has to finish the thing off.

C'mon, Beth.

C’mon, Beth.

 

Back with Maggie, Sasha, and Bob, they debate getting moving, discover that they only have six bullets left, and find that their compass is broken. Bob backs up Sasha’s decision to stay put, and says that they’ll just have to keep an eye on the sun to maintain their bearings. In huge contrast to opening-scene Bob, he’s being extremely optimistic, and it’s noticeable as the women folk look none too pleased.

We catch up with Daryl and Beth again, as she limps along to a clearing where a small cemetery and funeral home a spread out. She asks to take a break, and he gallantly offers to give her a piggy back ride across the graveyard, and she’s not fooling anyone.

Come ON, Beth.

Come ON, Beth.

 

Also, I sure hope that that crossbow has a safety on it (even though I know Daryl would never use it), because he turns it to hang on his chest, and it could easily fire and hit either one or the both of them in the face if it’s jostled the wrong way.

Beth hopes that there are people in the funeral home, and Daryl promises to take care of them, to which she assures him that there are still good people left out there in this terrible, terrible world that they live in. He doubts that the good ones survive. On the way there, they pass by a tombstone which reads “Beloved Father,” and Beth has a moment, reaching to hold Daryl’s hand due to a lack of subtlety for emotional support.

Come on, BETH.

Come on, BETH.

 

Meanwhile, Sasha, Bob, and Maggie, come across a sign for Terminus, opening up another debate for their next course of action. Bob claims to have heard a broadcast about this on the radio, but it was unclear. Maggie immediately decides that they should head there, saying that Glenn would head there, looking for her looking for him looking for her looking for him.

I still don't know how to feel about this place.

I still don’t know how to feel about this place.

 

Sasha… Is not so enthused about the idea, having been expelled from the prison, accepted into Woodbury, fled from Woodbury, fought Woodbury twice, and forced to abandon the prison. So, proposed utopian sanctuary-ish places and promised aren’t sitting particularly well with her. Bob suggests that others could be there, including Tyreese, and Sasha just blows past that ray of hope, but realizes that she’s already been outnumbered.

Cue dramatic music... Furthering my inability to make an informed opinion about Terminus.

Cue dramatic music… Furthering my inability to make an informed opinion about Terminus.

 

Inside, they find the place very well-kept, meaning that there must still be someone there. They also find… what looks like a funeral in progress. A body lies in an open casket. Having no concept of propriety nor fucking hygeine, Daryl touches the face, leaving a scooped out hollow because the man has decomposed to the point of being comprised of 95% human pudding.

I'm not posting that DISGUSTING image here because I love all of you greatly. So, instead, here's a picture of a bunch of golden retriever puppies in a wicker basket!

I’m not posting that DISGUSTING image here because I love all of you greatly. So, instead, here’s a picture of a bunch of golden retriever puppies in a wicker basket!

 

In the basement, they find more bodies being prepped for burial, and Beth finds it kind of beautiful that whoever is living here is still trying to honour these people’s memories like this. Daryl just wants to bandage her stupid ankle. I don’t see any head wounds on these bodies. And it makes me really, really nervous.

Back in the woods, Sasha is having a real hard time opening a can with her hunting knife. She tries to convince Bob that they need to not go to Terminus, but instead to find a town and a building and set up shop there. Plus the fact that Glenn is likely dead already. Maggie is off getting firewood during their exchange. Bob tells her that she needs to face the real reason she wants to stop.

This whole scene, she does not get this can open.

The struggle is REAL.

The struggle is REAL.

 

In the funeral home, Beth and Daryl find a cupboard full of soda, peanut butter, jelly, and pigs feet. I’ve never seen Daryl happier.

You had me at pigs feet. Except for not really.

You had me at pigs feet. Except for not really.

 

They’re about to clear the place out, but Daryl says that they should just take some because the lack of dust means that someone was still here. Beth tells him that he’s the “good people left” that she was talking about earlier and Daryl, in true Daryl Dixon fashion, has no response to that. Instead, he proceeds to scoop out jelly with what I’m pretty sure was the same hand he scooped out that dude’s face with and I’m going to go ahead and throw up now.

Outside, he sets up their standard string of cans as a perimetre alarm. Inside, Beth hits the piano and starts to sing again.

COME ON, BETH.

COME ON, BETH.

 

And, yeah, that’s Daryl lying in the coffin because it’s the comfiest bed he’s ever laid in. And he stares at her thoughtfully when she’s not looking. And he seems to be having a minor internal struggle. And this show about walking dead people and this scene where he’s laying in an empty coffin in a funeral home wherein several bodies are in an advanced stage of decomposition, just got a little bit CREEPY.

The next morning, Sasha and Bob wake up to find a message written in the sand.

Because you should never talk about bitches behind their backs... Because they're almost always within earshot.

Because you should never talk about bitches behind their backs… Because they’re almost always within earshot.

 

On the road, Maggie is about to carve into one of the Terminus sign posts, but instead carves up a walker with a crazed look on her face.Why would she put her hands elbows deep into a walker’s guts? Well, a very smiley Bob and an incredulous Sasha come across the answer.

I mean, why dull the knife blade. Right?

I mean, why dull the knife blade. Right?

 

So, that’s awesome. Second time we’ve seen crazy-eyed Maggie since the mid-season premiere.

Also, she should work on her penmanship.

Daryl carries Beth to breakfast in the funeral home, just to make me uncomfortable.

And it's working. Guys... Please stop.

And it’s working. Guys… Please stop. Please. Oh, pretty, pretty please.

 

But before Daryl can sink into his beloved pigs feet, the cans rattle, alerting them to an intruder. Daryl goes to check it out.

FUN FACT: In real life, that dog lost it's eye while saving its owner from a carjacking, according to "Talking Dead." So, kudos to you, Dooley the dog!

FUN FACT: In real life, that dog lost it’s eye while saving its owner from a carjacking, according to “Talking Dead.” So, kudos to you, Dooley the dog!

 

Norman Reedus has probably never been happier to see a one-eyed dog, especially after eating that eel last week. The dog, meanwhile, bolts when he moves to pet it. Beth comes to what the matter was, and he gently chastises her for not listening, before suggesting that it might come back around. The go back to breakfast together and I DON’T LIKE IT.

That night, Bob and Sasha are camped out, trying to sleep despite the violently loud moans of a walker they think must be stuck on something nearby. Neither can sleep, and Bob starts the ask her the incredibly uncomfortable question of whether she’s too afraid to find out for sure if her brother is alive or dead. When he doesn’t answer, he tells her that he thought she was the toughest person he’d ever met, while simultaneously being the sweetest. She has no answer, for some reason forgoing the slap he kind of needs right now, and he settles back down to try and sleep again.

In the funeral home, Beth is drafting a thank you note, and Daryl tells her that maybe they ought to stay until the owner returns. That maybe they can coexist.

Huh.

Hopeful Daryl.

It’s weird. Sweet. But weird all the same.

Beth asks him what suddenly changed his mind about the presence of good people left, and he gives her fucking look, AND I DON’T LIKE IT.

Praise Jeebus, the moment is interrupted by rustling cans and the sound of a dog yelping. Daryl goes to give it a pig’s foot. Now, clearly, hopeful Daryl and this unholy thing that hopefully isn’t even a thing and I’m imagining it a-brewin’ between him and Beth is a bad thing, because the ever-vigilant redneck opens the door without looking, and it’s five billion zombies at the door.

A weird-ass fight scene ensues, where he of course tells Beth to run because even he knows she’s not about to be helpful while operating under the double whammy of A.) having a sprained ankle, and B.) still being Beth. Why is the scene awkward, though?

Well… See, every time that Daryl uses his crossbow as a club or fires it in close proximity it just bugs the hell out of me. You have one weapon, which is already a terrible way to operate, and you have a finite number of arrows, two of which broke last episode, and if you damage your crossbow, then fuck the whole damned thing. He first lures them deeper into the basement, where the bodies are still on gurneys and are apparently not going to rise and where he already knows he has no alternative escape, instead using an examination table as a two foot wide barricade and he uses scalpels to stab the walkers in the head, repeating the process once over after her crawls through their legs and escapes back up the stairs, retrieving only one of his arrows.

All in all a terrible series of terrible ideas. Culminating, by the way, in Beth’s disappearance. As a car speeds off. Because she’s being kidnapped, I guess. Because she’s Beth.

I CANNOT.

I CANNOT.

 

And one episode’s worth of character growth and the attempt to make her appear more competent has just been completely undone.

Daryl, meanwhile, chases after her on foot, because he’s part gazelle and he really thinks that he has a chance of catching her, calling her name all the time. He eventually stops and kneels, defeated, in the middle of the road, having lost the trail somehow.

Bob and Sasha approach a town and she finally decides that this whole sticking together thing is for chumps, and that she’s rather go full Morgan and go crazy in an abandoned building by herself for the rest of her life. Bob kisses her goodbye and heads off to find Maggie.

Because kissing her isn't enough to convince her that she doesn't have to go it alone. So, Bob you need to work on your game, chief.

Because kissing her isn’t enough to convince her that she doesn’t have to go it alone. So, Bob you need to work on your game, chief.

 

He heads further down the tracks and Sasha finds a nice brick building with a flat roof to go and cry in.

To quote Arrested Development, "I've made a terrible mistake."

To quote Arrested Development, “I’ve made a terrible mistake.”

 

She quickly fucks shit up by accidentally breaking a window after seeing Maggie lying amongst a row of dead walkers, calling all of the still roaming zombies to their location.

She sprints out and the two of them tag team the mini hoarde.

Followed by a heart-to-heart.

Followed by a heart-to-heart.

 

Maggie tells Sasha that she was waiting for them, that she can’t go it alone, and that, yeah, she can ask them to risk their lives. Sasha admits her fears, and they head off to find Bob together.

Meanwhile, Daryle finds himself in a Mexican standoff as a group of ruffians who admittedly are ever-smitten with the idea of flat out murdering people find him and surrounds him. Their leader, Joe, laughs off a punch (never a good sign) and tells him that he’s been looking for a crossbow like that, and then talks Daryl into not pulling the trigger, since his boys will end him, too, right on the spot.

So, will Daryl end up going back to his old ways, mindlessly following what looks to be Merle 2.0? Or will he miraculously slaughter them all against all odds, like he always seems to do? Or will be backslide a little, but still try to advance as a character and fucking find Beth?

Probably that last one.

Ugh.

Ugh.

 

Sooo, there goes that whole “there are still good people out there” thing. Whomp whomp.

We catch up with Bob, walking down the tracks, stopping when his name is called and finding that the girls have also caught up with him. Hugs are exchanged, and the trio head on down the tracks.

Aww.

Aww.

The last shot is one of a Terminus sign and a mangled looking, armoured hand.

Guess who..?

Guess who..?

It pans out to reveal Glenn, disbelieving hope in his features.

It is!

It is!

 

So, naturally, I’m very excited about this whole thing! But, I’m also very nervous. Why, you ask?

Well, see, I’ve been a Glenn/Maggie supporter since they met, and I’ve been terrified ever since. Shows like The Walking Dead and Game of Thrones like to give you the feels before they completely destroy you by killing off your favourite characters. Last season, when Glenn ever so romantically went ring shopping for her and proposed and they got married-ish, I was afraid that one or the other of them was going to bite it. When certain casualties occurred in the comic, I got worried. This season, when Glenn got sick, I was concerned that they might pull a second Downton Abbey and kill off Maggie just because it looked like Glenn was going to die for a moment there.

And now, with them separated but still apparently heading to the same place, to this sanctuary and this promise of survival… I’m really worried that one or both of them won’t make it to the end of the season.

And that would be some bullshit. And I likely wouldn’t watch for much longer if that happened. I already gave zero fucks about Downton after the events of just-past-mid-season-3. I’m not above throwing in the towel for a series when the characters I’m most emotionally invested in get got.

So, because I really do enjoy this stupid show, though, let’s hope that it doesn’t come to that. The current cast is excellent. Yes, even Beth. I appreciate that the showrunners are giving her and Carol more of a presence this season, and that every character, really, is at least getting his or her moment.

So, what do we think will happen this season? Somebody’s not going to make it, and from next episode’s promo, it doesn’t look good for the Tyreese and Carol clan. I’m thinking something happens to one of those little girls. Or maybe Tyreese finally learns about what Carol’s done.

But, I believe that the majority of the group is going to make it to Terminus, and that their independent arrivals, or maybe just the first or the last group’s arrival, with close up the season, kind of on a happy note, but with an ominous feeling just to keep us on our toes. They’ll introduce the leader of Terminus, and in such a way that it leaves us all wondering as to whether he’s a truly benevolent figure, or he’s another Governor waiting to happen.

If we get a Glenn and Maggie reunion, chances are that Abraham will being needling them all towards Washington again.

But, with three episodes left until the finale, something heartbreaking and tragic has to happen, so one of these groups will face a loss. It may be Glenn or Maggie, but I’m hoping that the still fresh loss of Herschel will give the remaining Greene family members a bit of a reprieve. Sasha is now in an interesting place, relationship-wise, with ties to her brother and also to Bob now as a budding romantic interest, so she may be put into the middle of a difficult situation at some point. Plus, the series’ track record with black characters isn’t the best. If Carol’s actions are revealed, and she makes it to the finale, she may end up doing something heroic to redeem herself in the eyes of Tyreese, or to possibly give a last lesson about strength or some bullshit to the girls, so that’s a possibility. But it’s also a bit of a cliche.

Either way, I hope that the cast makes it through, picking up some redshirts on the way so that they’re the marks instead.

Or, really, I just hope that they stop giving Daryl superpowers just because he’s a fan favourite.

Because really.

Anywho, catch us next week for another installment of “The Walking Recap!”

See you there!

Game of Throne Season 4 Posters

Game of Throne released new character posters for the upcoming season.

Tywin Lannister

Tywin Lannister – you hate him but at the same time you respect him.

Tyrion Lannister

Tyrion Lannister – the only Lannister anyone likes and the one person you want to get drunk with

Cersei Lannister

Cercei Lannister – probably the most hated of the Lannisters – she is Queen Bitch

Jaime Lannister

Jaime Lannister – the only Lannister on the road to redemption?

Joffery

Joffery – the most hated character on the show – definitely the most hated Lannister (well he’s not a Baratheon), here is to hoping he dies this season.

Margaery Tyrell

Margary Tyrell – the girl who really wants to be Queen, I don’t know if Joffery is really worth it.

Sansa Stark

Sansa Stark – here is to hoping that she will finally figure out how to play the game

Bran Stark

Bran Stark – let us hope that he is able to find what he is looking for north of the wall

Ayra Stark

Arya Stark – the most badass of all the Starks, lets see where her vendetta against all those who wronged her family leads her.

Jon Snow

Jon Snow – the bastard of the Stark family, lets see how things go for him now that he is back with the Nights Watch.  Lets hope those arrows his pissed off girlfriend shot him with don’t do too much damage.

Ygritte

Ygritte – she a woman scorned now

Tormund

Tormund – lets see how he reacts to being duped by Jon Snow.

Melisandre

Melisandre – the red woman, the red witch; what other devious plans do she have to put Stannis on the throne.

The Hound

The Hound – what does he have in store for him and Arya?

Brienne

Brianne of Tarth- she has given Jaime back to the Lannisters, now she has to take Sansa and Arya, but Arya is not in Kings Landing.

Oberyn Martell

Oberyn Martell – what is this guys story, I can’t help but think that he has something up his sleeve.

Littlefinger

Littlefinger – he is always up to something and what is with his fascination with Sansa.  Does she really remind him of her mother that much?

Khalessi

Khalessi Daenerys – will she ever get to Westeros?  Will she ever fly on the backs of her dragons?  With any luck we will be seeing more dragons this season and her saying Dracarys.

Sir Jorah Mormont

Sir Jorah Mormont – will he ever find out his father was killed?  Will he ever get out of the friendzone?

Daario Naharis

Daario Naharis – what is this guys story? He kills his own men and then swears allegiance to Khalessi, how do we know he don’t turn on her?

I cannot wait to see Season 4 and for all of you to find out what will happen to these characters.  The joy of having ready the books I know what is going to happen.

-Christena

The Walking Recap – TWD S4E11 “Claimed”

No Daryl this episode. Half of you can leave now.

J/K, assholes. Don't leave.

J/K, assholes. Don’t leave.

 

Here’s what happened:

So, there really was no Daryl in this episode. Instead, we go back and forth between Rick, Carl, and Michonne, and then Glenn, Tara, and Abraham and his crew.

We open with Tara, riding in the back of Abraham’s truck, keeping an eye on a still passed out Glenn and keeping a sharp eye out for every landmark and road sign that she can. She’s actually being a good buddy a la the buddy system, and seems to really be trying to make amends for her part in the assault on the prison.

Her hands are covered in permanent marker, writing down place names and prominent features.

Her hands are covered in permanent marker, writing down place names and prominent features.

 

The truck comes to a stop when the road is blocked, and Abraham comes out just as Tara is about to open fire on a small group of walkers that have been following them and have now caught up. He takes them out with a tire iron, and then borrows Tara’s rifle to finish the job via smashing a surprisingly resilient walker’s head in with the butt of the gun.

Tara comments that that’s something which she’s never seen before, and he reminds her that he saw her bash in a walker’s head just hours before. She tells him that the thing she’s never seen before was a man who did it while smiling.

Well, man's gotta have a hobby.

Well, man’s gotta have a hobby.

 

He tells her that he’s the luckiest guy in the world. Then orders her to help him move the cars that are obstructing their path.

After the opening credits run, we get to catch up with Carl and Michonne. They’re having breakfast, lamenting the lack of milk, even soy, when Carl brings up Judith in an anecdote… Which leads to the both of them getting uncomfortable/sad and Carl abruptly leaving the table.

Michonne goes to the kitchen, where Rick is puttering about like a man refusing to acknowledge that he needs to stay in bed because he’s got shit to do!

Bro, you've already looked through all of those drawers.

Bro, you’ve already looked through all of those drawers.

 

She asks him what the plan is now, whether this highly vulnerable plantation style-ish house is home now, because she weren’t there for the farm to see how well that worked out but she really ought to be able to figure from the whole prison deal. He says that they ought to stay there until they figure something out, and the two share a look that says they both understand that they’re staying until Rick at least isn’t about to keel over. They discuss going out for more supplies, and Rick is like, “‘Kay, I’m totes ready,” but she tells him that he’s stupid and he needs to rest. Michonne tells him that she’ll take Carl.

They sync watches and agree to be back by noon. Ish.

I still think that there's no way that Carl's strong enough to fire that massive pistol and be able to compensate for the kick of that mule.

I still think that there’s no way that Carl’s strong enough to fire that massive pistol and be able to compensate for the kick of that mule.

 

After their first house, Michonne playfully asks Carl if he found any cookies or chocolate bars. He tells her that there wasn’t anything even remotely as amazing as 112 oz. of chocolate pudding, and she whips out her take. A can of spray cheese!

For which, I think, she looks entirely too excited.

For which, I think, she looks entirely too excited.

He’s less than impressed, and so she takes the opportunity to down a whole bunch of the stuff.

The zombies will never get her, but I dunno about canned cheese product, girl.

The zombies will never get her, but I dunno about canned cheese product, girl.

 

He still doesn’t laugh, and she apologizes, musing that her humour might be better suited to toddlers. As they clear out another house for supplies (“Food, Batteries, Water, in that order.”), she opens up about having had a three year old son. Carl immediately bombards her with questions, and she agrees to answer them, one at a time, after each room that they’ve cleared and searched.

Back at Ranch-O Rick, our hero is… Taking a nap after having fallen asleep reading a book. A selection of Jack London’s short stories. He is awoken by the sounds of fighting from downstairs, as a group of violence-prone male survivors entres the house and seemingly kills one of their own right away. He gave his gun to Carl, and the men have assault weapons, so he has to resort to hiding under the bed… In a very manly fashion.

How could they not just smell you, though, Rick?!

How could they not just smell you, though, Rick?!

Naturally, one of the men decides to up and take a nap on Rick’s claimed bed, trapping him under the bed as it sags under the man’s weight.

Meanwhile, our two favourite junk food aficionados are still playing their rousing game of opening emotional scars. She reveals his name, “Andre,” and the fact that he was her only child, plus that he died early on after the outbreak.

And she's actually taking it all very well as she checks out these peoples' paintings.

And she’s actually taking it all very well as she checks out these peoples’ paintings.

Carl brings her another painting, this one wrapped in white paper, to bribe her into answering his next question. He heads off to clear out another room, and she uncovers the painting to reveal a portrait of a young girl that’s been streaked with red and her mouth violently X-ed out. It kinda kills the mood, and Michonne heads out to investigate more of the house, since shit just took kind of a serial killer-y turn. She stalks through children’s rooms and discovers an entire family having killed themselves in one of the kids’ rooms, holding hands and laying in bed.

Some tears ensue. Probably due to the stench.

Some tears ensue. Probably due to the stench.

 

She slips out of the room and very subtly presses herself against the door as Carl walks in. He assumes that a child was inside. She tells him that it was a dog, and he doesn’t press the matter. He tells her that his dad let him name Judith, and then muses that maybe she and Andre are together somewhere. She tells him that they ought to be getting back, because Rick will be getting worried, and because she’s kind of a way better mom than Lori was.

Speaking of Rick, he is almost found out when one of the other men comes into the room and strangles the one of the men, leaving him unconscious on the floor inches from Rick’s face, just so that he can now take a nap in a grown-up sized bed.

How are these guys sticking together and living?!

How are these guys sticking together and living?!

 

We finally check back in with Glenn and Tara, and Glenn is adamant as ever about finding his wife. Tara tells him that they’ve been driving for three hours, and that they passed the remains of the prison folk who “escaped” on the bus, but she assures him that she can find their way back via her very “hand”-y (<- see what I did there?) set of directions. Glenn forces Abraham to stop the truck, and picks up his gear and starts walking.

Abraham chases after him, telling him that they’ve got to stick together and that the fate of the human race depends on Dr. Mullet over there on the left.

Also known as Captain Useless. I could never put my faith in this dude's hands, for so any reasons.

Also known as Captain Useless. I could never put my faith in this dude’s hands, for so any reasons.

 

Abraham says that they’ve got to get him, a scientist, to Washington DC, because Dr. Mullet knows exactly what caused this whole mess.

Uh…huh. Well, I call bullshit, but I’m not in the show. So, when Glenn asks what happened, and Dr. Mullet tells him that it’s classified, he takes a walk. Abraham, however, still isn’t willing to let him go, telling him to accept that his wife is dead, and that even if she is alive, he’ll never find her again.

Glenn takes the news about as well as can be expected.

Glenn takes the news about as well as can be expected.

 

None too pleased about getting punched in his ginger face, Abraham tackles Glenn and the two fight while the woman folk try to pry them apart. Dr. Mullet, meanwhile, panics at the sight of a solitary walker.

CAPTAIN USELESS, AWAY!

CAPTAIN USELESS, AWAY!

Seeing that help isn’t coming, he hurries to retrieve a weapon which he has no idea how to handle, and proceeds to fire at exactly the wrong spot, attract more walkers, and fuck up the truck as well, all while Glenn, Abraham, and the girls rush back to neutralize the threat. The whole crew opens fire and likely wastes a metric fuck ton of bullets taking out only about a dozen walkers… And Tara needs some direction because her firing looks kind of awkward, since her gun doesn’t have a shoulder stock and looks pretty shaky.

These guys look pretty solid in this still, despite Dr. Mullet's uselessness and this broad's desperate need of pants.

These guys look pretty solid in this still, despite Dr. Mullet’s uselessness and this broad’s desperate need of pants.

 

They do make short work of the minihorde and Abraham quickly notes that there’s been damage to what’s probably supposed to be the fuel line. An inauspicious introduction for Dr. Mullet.

DUCT TAPE, MOTHER FUCKER!

DUCT TAPE, MOTHER FUCKER!

 

Checking back in with Rick, he tries to escape from under the men’s notice, while we hear talk drifting up from downstairs about how a woman’s shirt has been washed and is hanging on a line to dry… The men are planning to basically rape Michonne as soon as she gets back in. So… Yeah, Rick, you need to hurry on up. As he slips around corners and ducks into other rooms, Rick has a series of narrow escapes from the eyes of the men… Until he ducks into the second floor bathroom and comes face to face with a dude just sitting, fully clothed, on the toilet, lid closed and with the door wide open.

Strangling seems to be the favourite method of murder this episode...

Strangling seems to be the favourite method of murder this episode…

 

Rick fights this dude who just can’t reach the scissors on the vanity and who also doesn’t have the presence of mind to at least fire a warning shot from his rifle to alert the other men that there’s a problem in the house, leaving him on the ground, either unconscious or dead. Although, considering that they’re stomping around, grunting, and knocking all of the shit off of the sink and nobody ever comes running, maybe he knew that it would be to no avail anyways.

Rick now has what looks like an uzi and a pair of scissors, and leaves through the window.

Pausing briefly to eye fuck the camera, of course.

Pausing briefly to eye fuck the camera, of course.

 

He drops down to the back porch and circles the house, ready to take out this motherfucker on the front porch as he sees Carl and Michonne approaching in the distance.

This dude who is eating like he's on a diet and is spitting out half of what's on his spoon.

This dude who is eating like he’s on a diet and is spitting out half of what’s on his spoon.

 

However the heck far away they are, Abraham realises that the truck is completely unreasonably fucked, and so Glenn gets his wish of heading back to the truck in the hopes that Maggie will be there, waiting to meet up with him. Abraham agrees to follow when Dr. Mullet tells him that they can find another car and another way, and that he should trust him because he’s smarter than Abraham.

...Kill Dr. Mullet. Really. Right now. That's it. Done.

…Kill Dr. Mullet. Really. Right now. That’s it. Done.

 

Elsewhere, Rick is saved from having to engage in a firefight for which he’s woefully outgunned when the sound of shouting and gunfire erupts from within the house, presumably since his victim up in the bathroom may have turned by now and it attacking the the rest of the would-be rapists.

See Rick run. Run, Rick, run!

See Rick run. Run, Rick, run!

 

We see one more shot of Tara and Abraham discussing his mission and debating what makes a good person, both of them denying their own goodness because of past sins.

Then, the episode closes on Michonne, Rick, and Carl spotting a banner for Terminus, the supposed sanctuary, and agreeing to head there for lack of a better plan.

Note to self, always have a series of back up plans, because the alternative is walking on train tracks, and that sounds like a sprained ankle waiting to happen.

Note to self, always have a series of back up plans, because the alternative is walking on train tracks, and that sounds like a sprained ankle waiting to happen.

 

So! Grimes & Co. are headed for Terminus! So are Tyreese and Carol and the girls! So, we should get to see Judith reunited with her family! This will bring great joy!

But we should also end up seeing Rick and Carol meeting, and then probably a blow-out once Tyreese learns of Carol’s actions… So… Also awesome.

I’ve been waiting for that.

I’m also holding out for a Glenn Maggie reunion.

HOWEVER. Next week’s preview looks like a Daryl/Beth episode, and pretty heavy on the Beth. And the guest on “Talking Dead” is going to be Norman Reedus, and that never bodes well for an actor’s character’s fate on the show itself.

Either way, see you then, and let’s hope that the rest of the season isn’t comprised of these little fucking mini vignettes focusing on pockets of characters. I want to see some advancing story! PLOT, DAGNABIT!