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New 52 Comic Review – “World’s Finest” #21

Picking up where last issue left off, this Earth’s evil Ken has opened a portal which supposedly leads to Earth 2, home for Karen and Helena.

And the whole place kind of looks like it's on fire.

And the whole place kind of looks like it’s on fire.

 

Karen is none too pleased with the idea that this Ken is kind of a douchebag, and physically attacks him while sprouting… I wanna say bad poetry, maybe?

"My lovely Ken." Sounds weird, no?

“My lovely Ken.” Sounds weird, no?

  Read the rest of this entry

New 52 Comic Review – “World’s Finest” #20

Welcome to the second chapter of the Batman/Superman and World’s Finest crossover.

After a very strong first chapter in Batman/Superman #8, let’s check in on how the characters and the story are progressing in the girls’ own book.

Picking up from right where the previous chapter left off, Karen wakes up mid-plummet, but feeling a hell of a lot better than Superman does, apparently.

Which is not a good thing, really.

Which is not a good thing, really.

 

Not willing to take the chance that their invulnerability has been compromised by the hit and Power Girl’s recent power fluctuations, Batman and Huntress move to intercept them in the jet.

Yeah, Earth 2 is weird like that.

Yeah, Earth 2 is weird like that.

 

As Karen is struggling to right herself, she and Clark are caught in a net and lowered safely to the ground by the Bat Jet, while Huntress once again marvels at the similarities between this Batman and her father.

Batman's not here for it. You don't need training, you don't automatically obey him, he can't fuck you...

Batman’s not here for it. You don’t need training, you don’t automatically obey him, he can’t fuck you…

 

While Karen has been really adamant this entire run about not ever meeting Superman and keeping interactions with Supergirl to an absolute minimum (although, I really think that, if anyone were a good idea to try and talk Kara down a la the Red Daughter arc going on right now, it’d be Karen motherfucking Starr), Helena looks to be conversely kind of latching onto Batman, earnestly looking for a reason to build an attachment with this Batman. Maybe with this Earth.

Upon landing, Batman and Huntress rush to Power Girl and Superman to look them over.

The glowing kind of gives it away.

The glowing kind of gives it away.

 

Power Girl recognizes the glowy business as a bad sign and tells them to back away.

Batman seems to have lost his ability for Bat Logic since he's not invulnerable in any way.

Batman seems to have lost his ability for Bat Logic since he’s not invulnerable in any way.

 

Karen is about to call him out on his douchebaggery, and the display snaps Helena out of her attempted hero worship/daddy issues. His Bat Manners are severely lacking. But he does have a plan, having brought the Kryptonite ring. He hooks it around Clark’s neck, hoping that the ring will counteract the power overload and just render him, basically, a normal human.

And Clark just looks SUPER enthused about this course of action.

And Clark just looks SUPER enthused about this course of action.

 

When asked about whether he’s concerned about the fact that the ring could kill him, Batman shrugs the girls off and tells Power Girl that she’s been promoted to Kryptonian PowerHouse/pack mule, and that Huntress should stow Superman in the jet for now.Still irritated with his antics, Power Girl asks him whether he trusts her or if he’s taking her because he does happen to have another Kryptonite ring on himself as insurance.

Is he smirking because he has another ring? Because he’s fucking with her? Or is he just happy to be by her titties?

HINT: Boobs are always the answer.

HINT: Boobs are always the answer.

 

Huntress can’t believe how her not-dad treats her not-Godfather here. Shortly after they leave, Clark begins to come to and, apparently, being a normal human being is the WORST.

Legit.

Legit.

 

An unknown metahuman appears in the sky nearby and Huntress tells Clark to take cover. He asks if she’s kidding.

Helena, go ahead and cross "Push Superman into a cave" off of your bucket list.

Helena, go ahead and cross “Push Superman into a cave” off of your bucket list.

 

This dude with a target on his head and over his solar plexus appears and pretty much tells them all what they did and how to cause Power Girl’s powers to go all wonky.

As such, we shall call him Captain Exposition.

As such, we shall call him Captain Exposition.

 

Dude is tough, still stronger than normal even after Helena hits him with an exploding crossbow bolt. The fact surprises Helena for some reason, in this world where every fifth person is a super villain and this particular dude flew to you to start wailing on y’all.

Luckily, she’s able to use his awkward combination of super strength and poor combat skills and bad balance to her advantage, and is able to knock his bitch ass out with a kick to the face.

Even though the EXPLOSION didn't do it just a moment ago. Okay. Sure. Yeah.

Even though the EXPLOSION didn’t do it just a moment ago. Okay. Sure. Yeah.


Over with Batman and Power Girl in the villain’s country of New Gamorra, because biblical references to town destroyed for their wickedness aren’t a red flag AT ALL, Batman tries to tell PG how she’s gonna roll in there as Karen Starr, since they know her secret ID anyways and that somehow won’t be a giveaway. She, however, is still not having it or his attitude in general.

SUFFRAGE!

SUFFRAGE!

 

Batman just let’s her go like a dude who knows EXACTLY how his pals are going to act after their fifth Jaeger Bomb and has no control over the night or their ensuing mug shots and criminal records. Instead, he heads for the sewers, to tap directly into their systems via pipes and wires and shit, since PG will act as a distraction no matter what she does topside.

Again, BOOBS. Also, this had better not be a clue to growing Bat Feelings towards PG. Yick.

Again, BOOBS. Also, this had better not be a clue to growing Bat Feelings towards PG. Yick.

 

Topside, Karen is still pissed.

That's right. Only Selina Kyle-Wayne could TRAIN the BAT.

That’s right. Only Selina Kyle-Wayne could TRAIN the BAT.

 

But, as she approaches the boss-man, she’s shocked to find out his identity. The man behind this whole scheme is the Earth Prime of her briefly-boyfriend from Earth 2, Ken Somethingeoranother, son of a diplomat and young would-be hero who done got blowed up on Earth 2, as seen in the World’s Finest Annual #01.

And her feelings for him have never quite subsided, it seems.

And her feelings for him have never quite subsided, it seems.

He tells her that he’s really sorry about the whole mess of her powers, that her haywire abilities were the unfortunate side effect of a series of experiments being performed by the people of New Gamorra which, once again, doesn’t ring any bells or set off any alarms.

Despite her warning Helena about evil alternate universe twins in the first chapter of this arc!

Despite her warning Helena about evil alternate universe twins in the first chapter of this arc!

Meanwhile, unwilling to stay on the sidelines, Clark and Helena are using terrible pseudonyms and costumes which they apparently had already had stowed in the Bat Jet, plus to advantage of being WHITE in an Asian country and so totally sticking right the fuck out (but then, I’m still not sure about Ken because he’s white in WF and Asian in BS) to operate as civilians to solve some shit right under the noses of the general populace of New Gamorra.

Clark also needs to get the "I'm gonna barf at ANY second" look off of his face.

Clark also needs to get the “I’m gonna barf at ANY second” look off of his face.

So, as Batman is looking around underground and in secret rooms and shit, Karen is allowing herself to be led around by her feelings of puppy love for this dude who they pretty much know to be the villain, and who’s double she only knew for the span of a couple of hours back on Earth 2 anyways!

Girl! Never put anything in any hole in any situation with any person who you've know for LITERALLY less than five minutes. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? IS THAT NOT CLEARLY A DEVICE? BECAUSE IT'S CLEARLY A DEVICE. AND DEVICE'S ARE NEVER A GOOD THING.

Girl! Never put anything in any hole in any situation with any person who you’ve know for LITERALLY less than five minutes. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? IS THAT NOT CLEARLY A DEVICE? BECAUSE IT’S CLEARLY A DEVICE. AND DEVICE’S ARE NEVER A GOOD THING.

SIGH.

As Karen is amazed at the appearance of her home planet, at the fact that the big rock is still floating there in space, Batman makes a supremely creepy discovery.

Because of course.

Because of course.

Finally, Karen’s brain kicks in as Ken starts to wax on about the miracles he’s been able to make since reading her genetics, etc.

That's a villain smirk. Just punch him out now and save us six more issues of revelations and nonsensical action sequences.

That’s a villain smirk. Just punch him out now and save us six more issues of revelations and nonsensical action sequences.

Karen scoffs at his threats, saying that there’s no way that he would stop her. He, of course, isn’t concerned about that. Like every villain in plan one of evil plan revelation, he’s got his surprise ready to go.

An army of Kryptonian-Human hybrids. FANtastic.

An army of Kryptonian-Human hybrids. FANtastic.

 

Batman rushes to her aid, hopefully actually sporting that Kryptonite ring that he was vaguely threatening her with earlier.

Oh, NOW you want Superman breathing down your neck, huh?

Oh, NOW you want Superman breathing down your neck, huh?

Meanwhile, this might be the most ridiculous closing panel ever. While Karen and Bruce are WAY the fuck outmatched by dozens of beings who would individually at least give Karen a hard time to wrangle in, Clark and Helena’s big dilemma is… Illegal immigration.

So… I mean, they’re not in Arizona. Helena’s gonna punch this bro out and toss his unconscious body into a shrub while Clark gently chastises her and they continue to take photos, probably ending up with them either caught by a small cadre of armed guards and detained or uncovering yet another disturbing discovery. I mean, I’m guessing, but I’m sure it has to be getting weirder as the crossover continues.

Actually… It’s gotta be something about Earth 2.

It’s mentioned in the May solicits and everything that Earth 2 is still a thing.

So… Unfortunately, we actually do have to wait for the next chapter, now, but we’ve gotten a pretty solid start. This nano bot shit came out of nowhere, and it’s probably bad news that Clark has contracted robo-crabs from his parallel Earth cousin, since they can still probably read his whole life even while his own powers are being suppressed.

Hopefully this won’t just be “Karen’s Got A Problem, Now Clark’s Got a Problem, Now It’s Back Over To Karen, And So On!” But I will say that this issue and it’s preceding chapter in “Batman/Superman” are by far superiour to the usual stuff we’ve been seeing from “World’s Finest” on it’s own, at least for the past several months.

Let’s hope it gets even better.

Until next chapter!

Peace.

 

 

New 52 Comic Review – “Batman/Superman #8”

Since both of these issues were released this week, and since they are a much anticipated crossover event, I’m going to review them both today. Look out for World’s Finest #20 in a couple of hours.

This is the first issue of Batman/Superman that I’ve picked up since it’s New 52 relaunch. The writing so far is pretty damn good, and I’m kind of in love with the artwork. Plus the dynamic between Superman and Batman is kind of fun in an odd-couple kind of way. Given the distrustful nature of the New 52 in general, and the relative newness of these characters and their relationships in this universe, I can definitely appreciate this. Plus the writing for Helena and Karen is fucking spot on for two twenty-something besties.

On to the comic.

We pick up with Huntress trapped in the Batcave by Batman. He surmises that she’s only about seventeen (<–WHAT?!) and is surprised because she moves like a Robin, which I guess is a thing. She tells him her story, that she’s his daughter from an alternate universe.

Cross-dressing Joker might just be my favourite Joker.

Cross-dressing Joker might just be my favourite Joker.

She tells him that everything was groovy until Darksaid appeared and rent shit asunder. She tells him that she’s certain that everyone has died.

Holy balls, Wonder Woman, really?!

Holy balls, Wonder Woman, really?!

Batman being Batman, he’s not particularly willing to believe her story right away, but then some cosmic type shit happens and he’s hit with an image of himself facing alternate versions of himself.

Because COMICS.

Because COMICS.

Not able to deal with feeling feelings, he does the only logical thing outside of eating a pint of Ben and Jerry’s and/or downing a fifth of scotch.

Right in the face!

Right in the face!

I imagine that daddy Bruce must have won a lot of teenaged arguments and gotten her to stick to a pretty regular bedtime that way.

He starts to look through his system and tries to make sense of her story in the context of his world and his experience, and she soon joins him because, let’s face it, she’s probably built up a hell of an immunity to all kinds of sedatives based on my assumptions of Batman’s parenting skills, particularly combined with Catwoman’s certain efforts to playfully undermine him at every turn.

She's pretty casual about getting shot in the face with a tranquilizer dart......

See? She’s pretty casual about getting shot in the face with a tranquilizer dart……

She shows him surveillance and satellite footage of Power Girl and they aim to intercept her as her powers continue to go wonky. She asks if they’re going to call in Superman, since he and Batman are the World’s Finest drinking buddies.

bs08-06

Beware the Bat laugh!

He says that Superman is too reckless and that they shouldn’t tell him Jack shit. Huntress isn’t so fond of the mentality.

And this is one of many reasons why TFP ships Catwoman/Batman above all others.

And this is one of many reasons why TFP ships Catwoman/Batman above all others.

Karen overhears their whole conversation, even mid overpowered rampage and offers her friend some sage advice.

What's with the posture, though!

What’s with the posture, though!

So, usually giving advice gleaned from movies isn’t the best idea, but it’s a totally legitimate genre to quote when your whole life is within the pages of a comic book. Either way, though, Helena’s not listening and Karen’s going ladyballs out crazy.

WHY DON'T THE PEOPLE WITH HEAT VISION EVER JUST FUCKING CLOSE THEIR EYES WHEN THEIR POWERS GO HAYWIRE?!

WHY DON’T THE PEOPLE WITH HEAT VISION EVER JUST FUCKING CLOSE THEIR EYES WHEN THEIR POWERS GO HAYWIRE?!

And just as disaster strikes and all seems lost, entre Superman to save a little brown boy and his dog from being turned to ashes… But not to provide food or shelter or water or medicine or to help provide any kind of economic support, of course. I mean, Batman could totally make that shit happen, but that’d make for a totally different comic and a for some reason less compelling hero.

But I digress.

Batman starts telling Superman what he needs to do and Helena gives Karen some directions as well, and both fucking Kryptonians flat out fucking ignore their Bat-Family counterparts.

bs08-10

The first example of why Super-People shouldn’t be allowed to make their own decisions.

The disaster averted, the crew sits Karen down and tries to figure out what to do next. Superman takes the lead here and once again dismisses Batman since he is, after all, a little bit of a douchebag.

He still isn't aware that she's his AU cousin.

He still isn’t aware that she’s his AU cousin.

After quoting Aladdin, he whisks her away to the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, where there is an inexplicable outcropping of rock for them to sit on, and he urges her to relax. She lets out a massive ejection of energy and says that it felt like a huge sneeze or a really good cry.

Daintiest super-powered high five ever.

Daintiest super-powered high five ever.

While the Super-People explore their emotions, the Bat-People get their shit done. Huntress and Batman are able to nail down a place and a dude from which the stuff that’s causing PG’s meltdown is coming.

This dude is one of Karen's Exes.

This dude is one of Karen’s Exes.

They head to this Asian country to infiltrate a fancy shindig being conveniently held at that exact moment and in the home and apparent lair of the evil Asian es-boyfriend. Enter Bruce Wayne, jet-setting billionaire playboy.

Next page, Helena can be found mildly creeped out at having to play the part of her pseudo-dad's playmate of the week.

Next page, Helena can be found mildly creeped out at having to play the part of her pseudo-dad’s playmate of the week.

She causes a scene and slips away when their host tends to Bruce’s lightly dinged ego. She hacks into their computers and uncovers… Something. Basically, shit isn’t going to end well Karen the way that things are going. Superman overhears them.

Aaaand, Karen is DONE.

Aaaand, Karen is DONE.

They see that Karen is, apparently, going to detonate! Batman urges Superman to get away from her, that he shouldn’t be in her proximity when she blows. But he’s not about to let her go through this by herself because he’s Superman, and he’s actually acting like it in a New 52 book for once!

bs08-17

Notice Helena’s being turned away. Her last tie to Earth 2 in danger? Her best friend in mortal danger? EMOTIONS.

The Bat-People are helpless to watch as Superman once again dismisses their orders, and Karen is at risk of ‘sploding.

Example 2 of why Super-People shouldn't be allowed to make their own decisions. Danger aside, what if the power fluctuations are CONTAGIOUS?!

Example 2 of why Super-People shouldn’t be allowed to make their own decisions. Danger aside, what if the power fluctuations are CONTAGIOUS?!

And this is how the issue ends! The both of them going kaflooey. A potentially TERRIBLE occurrence. What will our heroes do?! How will they get out of this one?!

Well… Just pick up the next issue, World’s Finest #20, since it also came out this week.

SPOILER ALERT: They’re fine. Solicits continue on through May, guys. Even if they die… This is comics.

True stories of the universe.

True stories of the universe.

Check back this evening for our review of World’s Finest #20 and the second chapter in the crossover event!

 

 

Comic Review – World’s Finest #19

Whoo.

Okay, you guys.

I have really high hopes going into this issue.

They ain't kidding. FINALLY.

They ain’t kidding. FINALLY.

Let’s just jump right in.

PG is deep in the waters off the coast of Namibia, mining the ocean floor for diamonds and antagonizing local animal life. As she flings an overly familiar giant squid out of the water and over a fishing boat full of awfully light-skinned folks, she muses that she can sell the diamonds to get some quick cash.

I bet this WILL disturb their catch. There does their livelihood. I guess it's back to piracy for them.

I bet this WILL disturb their catch. There does their livelihood. I guess it’s back to piracy for them.

She shoots out of the water when she’s collecting a few thousand karats, giving the fishermen a pretty good look at her as she goes.

Well, at least it's going towards a good cause.

Well, at least it’s going towards a good cause.

The next scene is New York, where, Karen and Helena are discussing their legal troubles over breakfast in their hotel room, and Karen assures her that, if nothing else, at least her powers aren’t still on the fritz!

Why she needs to awkwardly tug at her uniform I have no idea.

Why she needs to awkwardly tug at her uniform I have no idea.

She plans to fly Hel around the park, but, of course, her powers decide to take that moment to cut out on her, sending both of them, now powerless, crashing to the ground through tree limbs and shit.

Limbs and boobs flailing to no avail!

Limbs and boobs flailing to no avail!

Naturally, they both survive unscathed, aside from some testy remarks by Helena. In the next shot, Karen is having a board meeting and getting cheesed off. This sets off her heat vision, setting fire to random shit but, luckily again, not injuring or killing anybody.

HOW COULD HE NOT?!

HOW COULD HE NOT?! IT’S COMING FROM HER FUCKING FACE!

While Karen’s face explodes all over her company, Helena thinks that she’ll have to take her friend’s well-being into her own hands and go to her not-dad for help.

Vigilantism AND carbs? Jealous.

Vigilantism AND carbs? Jealous.

Karen, meanwhile, realizes that shit is not getting any better, and we can infer that she’s resigned herself to asking Superman for help.

Context clues, yo.

Context clues, yo.

Helena creeps around stately Wayne Manor, thinking about the best way to get in to talk to her pseudo-pops. She resigns herself to going in through the Batcave.

I mean, she IS in costume already.

I mean, she IS in costume already.

Batman, meanwhile, is being a creepster and stalking her right back, even making it easier on her to break in.

Creepy and cocky. Every girl's dream.

Creepy and cocky. Every girl’s dream.

Helena scopes out the cave, finding it different than her home, and remembering the difference in age between her dad and this Batman, calling him a near Rookie. He sneaks up on her, y’know, like ya do, and she trains her crossbow on him, because of reasons. She immediately lowers it, apologizing for the break-in, saying that she needs his help. He promptly traps her in some kind of scifi light-construct cage thing, demanding answers, and she very calmly responds…

Because, let's face it, she was probably expecting this kind of shit. Fuck, dude, imagine THAT childhood.

Because, let’s face it, she was probably expecting this kind of shit. Fuck, dude, imagine THAT childhood.

Sooo… Between giant squids, board meetings, and croissants… THIS ISSUE WAS ANOTHER FILLER ISSUE.

SON OF A BITCH.

I guess, if I want to see anything interesting happen in this comic, I have to buy Batman/Superman, too!

Which means that nothing interesting is still happening in this actual fucking comic book series.

FanTAStic.

I feel like I’m being trolled by DC Comics.

SIGH.

See you all in another series…