Ezra Miller to Play “The Flash” in “Batman v. Superman,” and I Don’t Care

(As you may be able to tell, I have lost all ability to mask my disdain at all things DC movie universe. But on with the article… )

Ezra Miller (“The Perks of Being a Wallflower”) has been cast as the Flash for an appearance in “Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice,” but it is still unknown as to what capacity we will be seeing any of the second tier JLA-ers in. Miller’s casting also has led some non-disillusioned fans to speculate as to which of the men to bear the mantle of the Flash he will be playing.

Costume Analysis – Wonder Woman in “Dawn of Justice”

Okay. Right off the bat. We’re not addressing the casting. We’re not talking about Gadot or her acting chops or her figure. We’re just talking costume dynamics.

This is a fan-made composite of the three solo character promotional images. From Reddit.

So let’s get dangerous!

UPDATED – First Pic of Gal Gadot in FULL Wonder Woman Costume!

According to photographer Adam Jay, this is the first image of Gal Gadot in her full Wonder Woman costume and make-up. This reportedly comes direct from SDCC.

…is it Gadot or is it he costume department and photo editor?

It’s a little dark and not so great a resolution, so we’re going to withhold judgement for now. The costume looks good from what we can see, but we’re still not sold on Gadot in the part.

DC Rumoured to Plan 7 Movie Releases in 2 Years

According to Nikki Finke, formerly of Deadline, Warner Brothers is planning to release over a half-dozen live-action movies based on DC Comics properties.

We’re getting there… But it probably won’t look anything like this.

The schedule is reportedly as follows:

• May 2016 – Batman v Superman
• July 2016 – Shazam
• Christmas 2016 – Sandman
• May 2017 – Justice League
• July 2017 – Wonder Woman
• Christmas 2017 – Flash/Green Lantern team-up
• May 2018 – Man Of Steel 2

 

So, a couple of things from this. Assuming that this is accurate…

Apparently, Dawn of Justice is not Man of Steel 2. Man of Steel 2 is going to be a separate movie, released 5 full years after its first installment. That… Seems like bad planning. If/when fans have their little movie marathons, Superman’s going to be aging super-fast. How old will he be by the time the third movie comes out?!

via sortadone.blogspot.com

And then there’s BatFleck, who has bulked up a bit, but who still faces a heck of a lot of nerdrage.

Tight shirts help.

Also… Can we not just call it “Captain Marvel?” Are we so sure that audiences are so uninformed as to confused Captain Marvel with Marvel Studios? I mean… I guess, but I’m sick of people calling one of DC’s heaviest hitters by the wrong name.

AND NOT ONE NAMED SHAZAM!

Also, if DC darkens this character, too, I don’t know what I’ll do with myself.

How tied-in to the rest of the DC Universe is the “Sandman” movie going to really be? Is he involved in JLA shennanigans? It’d certainly be a shake-up, but I don’t know that I would like that. In fact, I’m pretty sure that I wouldn’t, unless the story were truly tremendous.

And speaking of movies that will need a fantastic story for me to really get behind them… GL and Flash? Yeah. I love Green Lantern (the characters, not the movie *barf*), but have little attachment to the Flash. I loved Bart Allen in Young Justice and that was the end of my association with the Speed Force.

Can we get someone OTHER than Hal Jordan? I’d take Guy Gardner over him.

But the biggest deal here for me, for my Fangirls, and for women and feminists everywhere is going to be the supposed Wonder Woman movie. Will it stay true to the comics, pre-DCnU? Hopefully, as the New 52 origin of Diana of Themyscira has been butchered to make the only truly independently female icon’s beginnings now based on a man.

Also, a few weeks ago, Gal Gadot posted a progress picture of her workout to her Facebook page, certain that her new buff body would finally silence all of the nay-sayers complaining about her being too thing to play the Princess of the Amazons.

Um…

Now, maybe it’s the angle. There is some bicep and deltoid definition there, but that’s a hell of a slim brachialis still, so I don’t think that this photo is going to quell any of those fans’ concerns. It certainly isn’t doing anything for mine… I’ve made no secret of the fact that I have little faith in the casting, and I should clarify that I don’t like pretty much all of the casting news that I’ve heard so far, but I am going to go into the movies with as unbiased an opinion as I can. After all, I was pleasantly surprised by Anne Hathaway’s portrayal of Selina Kyle in “The Dark Knight Rises.”

But, really, there is so much that they could do wrong with the character. The story could be garbage, the costume could be wrong, they could over-sexualize her, Gadot may not be a good fit for the character, they could put her together with Superman and make me hate them even more than I did when they cast Amy Adams as Lois Lane.

Worst (non-cheesecake) characterization of a strong female character ever.

The one thing that Warner Bros really does have going for them is that all of their licensing falls under their own label, so they don’t face the limitations that Marvel has with respect to crossovers between Spider-Man (Sony), X-Men (Fox), and the Avengers and Guardians of the Galaxy (Marvel Studios).

Of course, Marvel is doing just fine for themselves and DC has been treading water since the mid-90’s.

What do you think of this schedule? Will it work? With WB already pushing back the release date of “Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice” by a years already, do you think that this schedule will actually be met?

Let us know in the comments!

 

 

First Set Photo of Gal Gadot as Diana Prince

In an age where anybody with a smartphone can become Paparazzo, it’s getting tougher and tougher for studios to keep things under wraps. Case in point, Instagram user armandarakjian uploaded this photo for all of the Interwebs to gawk at:

 

New 52 Comic Review – “Wonder Woman” #29

Oh, hey. Lookey there. Something finally happens.

 

Hera’s still chilling at the winery where Dionysus and his soon-to-be-turned-into-pigs comrades were in the previous couple of issues, leisurely ordering from the menu.

It’s like a disdain-off. WHO WILL WIN?

Of course, the menu is more interesting than the ball of green glowing fire hurtling towards her. Understandable, really.

The waiter’s taking a dive? Terrible service.

Since warning her would be ridiculous, the waiter dives out of the way while Hera is trying really hard to remember that she just wants, like, a Jack and Coke, of all things. And, of course again, the ball hits her.

So, mystical energy is just radiation, or what?

Back in the woods, Hermes and Demeter are trying to keep on their hunt, since the Moon is a little bit OCD.

And ADD.

She feels a disturbance in the Force and just fucking knows that Apollo’s in danger or hurt or in some other Charles Barkley level of turrible trouble, so she asks Hermes to transport them to Olympus right away.

On the ship, one of the engines has been damaged by the explosion, and Zola is in there trying to rescue Dio… Who we actually don’t see at all in this entire issue.

Bitch couldn’t call a sitter?

So, yeah, Zola’s kind of bad at things. But it’s okay because Wonder Woman is holding the plane up!

But she’s not doing too great a job, is she?

But, as turns out, nobody is good at things, because Hermes gets them to Olympus just in time for Diana’s strength to crap out on her, sending the ship pretty much crashing down on top of them.

By all rights, the issue should just end right there. Also, the series.

But, they are all on Olympus now… Or what’s left of it. And now everybody can be snarky to each other until they realize exactly what their current location means as far as, y’know, not dying goes.

Oh, wait, I’m a liar. There’s Dio.

NO! No. No. Look, I know that Greek mythology is just chock fucking full of incest, and that this was especially the case in the gods’ case, but I’m done with all of the incest in comics, movies, TV shows, and fucking fanfiction especially. I’m DONE.

But that’s a rant for another time.

Anywho, the hyena people start to flip the fuck out…

Yeah, bitch, you better hide.

And nobody seems to have noticed that they’re standing on red, squishy, raw-meat-smelling ground. And cue the appearance of the First Born. I’ve got to say, he’s looked better.

He’s looked worse.

Understandably, they’re not particularly keen on the idea of subservience to a monster, and Demeter in particular is pretty intent on that whole vengeance thing.

But lunging at this motherfucker is a bad idea, as they all ought to have known by now.

And I guess having no skin makes his veins weapons now, so he’s caught her and is sucking her energy away a la the Parasite.

All while monologuing!

Diana pulls a magic glowing bladed spear thingy out of… nowhere? And intend to also attack him head on.

Because, no, really, everyone is bad at everything in this issue.

And her attempts to be a baller don’t last very long, as she gets vein-drained.

Because nobody learns lessons any more.

And the monologue continues on, being way more painful than that whole imminent doom thing.

Stop antagonizing him!

The First Born says that he’s learned something during his captivity, and that it’s that power, love, life, blah, everything ends eventually.

A.) I’m not even sure that that make sense. Take a physics class, mother fucker. B.) That’s icky.

But, before he can up and end all of these assholes, the only person who is able to do any thing is the one person who’s been the most useless this whole, entire arc.

LIKE A BOSS.

The return of Hera to power! Literally. Her display of mad power, which really shouldn’t be intimidating since Apollo’s power transferring over to Hera shouldn’t have amplified it and the First Born done walloped Apollo good, well, it makes the First Born book it.

What a good sun (<-See what I did there?).

They leave Olympus in the ruins is was already in, Apollo’s guts all over the place and everything, and head to who-knows-where, where nobody questions it because they assume that wherever it is, it’s gonna be safe, so fuck it.

Nobody’s gonna take baby Zeke out of the bjorn and check him over? See if he’s alright and everything? No? Okay.

They pop on over to Themyscira, it turns out, so that Diana’s pseudo step-mother can give her a gift.

That’s a lot of bitches to send head-first into being murdered by the First Born.

The Amazons are back!

And I swear if this whole thing doesn’t feel like it just completely fell flat.

Like, “oh, hey, ladies, welcome back. I’ve nothing to say to you, despite the appearance in the comics so far that your petrification and the destruction of Paradise Island and I don’t even see my mom or any of my closest friends, but would you mind dying in throngs for me?”

And, Wonder Woman finally accepts her mantle, knowing that her denial has cost them until now. So, she’s not asking them as Princess…

Blah.

So, whoopee, she’s a harbinger of doom, to take down a harbinger of doom.

And I still feel like nothing happened. Hera’s back to power, yes, and last issue saw Apollo dying to give her back that power, but this whole story is just creeping along so slowly that I really do find it hard to care about one of my favourite characters.

I’m hoping that something happens to get rid of this First Born dude sooner rather than later, because I need this crap to be done with.

Honestly.

We need a new story, or at least better pacing.

And for now, I’ll be keeping an eye out for a downward spiral of yet another DC character, since being the god of war is more than likely going to be a thing that affects her as a character, morals and all.

Plus this whole “dating Superman” thing isn’t helping.

Gag.

Well, until next time.

 

 

New 52 Comic Review – “Superman/Wonder Woman” #6

Somebody needs to explain to me why this happened. Why did this pairing have to become a thing?

Zod and Faora are preparing to open the Phantom Zone and let loose all of the crazies, and Superman and Wonder Woman are flying around being pretty. Clark is having reservations about their operations as heroes. He’s worried that they may have been a better team when they weren’t also doing it. Once again, Wonder Woman callously dismisses his concerns because she’s kind of a bitch in this book.

Of course, to be fair, Clark is full of feelings all the time.

Knowing that it’s going to be a tough match between them and Zod and not-Ursa, they turn to Diana’s extended family for help. Namely, Hephaestus, who looks a heck of a lot like a parademon.

Especially in the pages on her own book and ESPECIALLY when he’s actually wearing his goggles.

It seems that Diana sees their biggest advantage as being the element of surprise, and since the other Kryptonians have the same heightened senses as Clark, that’s almost a moot point. Put it’s okay because Hephaestus has a solution for that.

So, as Zod and Whatsherface finish constructing their StarGate out of garbage, Clark and Diana blow their element of surprise with a since blow which pretty much barely fazes either of them, and which only actually hits Zod anyways.

Because they’re terrible at everything.

 

And I don’t know that I understand this next panel.

Okay, so I guess Hephaestus has, like, an invisible ship that he’s letting them use. Is that going to end up being the invisible jet?

More importantly, why would they emerge from it and announce their presence, even if they are sporting their new WitchBlade armour?

It really just looks like bad art direction, with missiles coming out of nowhere.

And the fight scene ensues. And something was bothering me about this whole thing, because, y’know, I’ve also been reading Wonder Woman’s solo series…

Oh, here we go.

Wait. What is that little yellow box saying?

GROWL.

SIGH. Come ON, DC! Wasn’t the whole point of the reboot to make sure that every comic is in-sync, storywise? All of the timelines would match up and the crossovers wouldn’t be so muddled?

Or is this your way of finally, albeit quietly, admitting that you only did it because you were officially out of ideas?

I think we know the answer.

But, back to the issue…

Fighting. Fighting. Fighting.

And this happens. They got the snot beaten out of them, but they’re okay and they’re going to somehow deliver the force of their blows right back to them.

In the lamest possible way.

BEWARE THE POWER OF HAND-HOLDING!

Because SCIENCE.

Apparently.

No. Y’know, what? I’m just going to assume that these suits were designed to absorb kinetic energy and expel it as energy energy a la Sebastian Shaw. Because I don’t think that that was ever stated, and I’m trying to make the leap for the writers since I’m really at my wit’s end with the New 52.

But, I digress. As I often do.

So, they knock Zod and Whosits down and out… Until the gods decide to continue hazing their sister’s boyfriend.

By directly blasting them with a super-dose of sunlight courtesy of Apollo. Who is currently dead in Wonder Woman. Which is why this is stupid. Well, not the only reason it’s stupid, really.

So, now they’re super-charged and gonna be pretty much impossible to beat.

Ha! Awesome.

Way to go, Apollo.

Lo and behold, they up and beat the ever-loving super-poo out of the two of them and them fly them over to a conveniently nearby nuclear plant with a solid lead core to dump them in.

Lead AND radiation. Good. So this shit will be over soon enough, right?

And now the rogue Kryptionians can fullfill their promise to the other inhabitants of the Phantom Zone. To create a hell on earth via a swarm of superpowered alien war criminals who will take over the planet and them probably fight with each other and destroy 91.5% of the planet in the process of their respective bids for power.

Still a better love story than Superman and Wonder Woman’s.

 

In their lead would-be tomb, Clark and Diana have a very stilted and breathless conversation, wherein they have no ability to figure this shit out, but Clark just fucking knows what they’re doing.

But, the conversation takes five years to get out because of all of the ellipses, and they lose anyways. Oh, wait…

And, finally, we get some literal ancient-Greek-deus ex machina.

Why would you ever bring this up in conversation?

And right before they’re about to make their tremendous sacrifice?

Ugh.

Which, by the way…

Not transparent at all.

And also…

I can’t believe I’m saying it, and I’ll probably never say it again, but Honey Boo Boo has a point.

And kablooey. And I’m sure that there was nobody working in or living near that nuclear power plant they were trapped inside of at the moment.

Casualties shmasualties.

So, it looks like they’ve stopped the bad guys! Right? I mean, surely, they must have with a blast like that!

Escpecially since… Well, take a look at them, lying at ground zero.

Oh, look. He wrapped her in his cape. Chivalry isn’t dead; it’s just a special kind of special.

And that’s how the series ends.

…Not really. But I woulnd’t mind it! I like Superman. I like Wonder Woman. They’re my two favourite DCU characters… Pre-New 52. I really don’t like them now. And I especially, in case any of you guys haven’t cottoned on by this point, hate them together. It just doesn’t fit!

They don’t fit.

They’re a great team when tey fight alongside one another, but I don’t see the whole romance thing working out for them. The reason that Lois and Clark were such a good match was because, among numerous other reasons, it gave Superman/Clark a real depth. It brought him closer to his humanity, made him really one of us normal folks walking the earth, at least for a little while. And his humanity drove his heroics.

But with him dating Wonder Woman, it’s more like he’s being pulled away from his humanity. And I have a problem with that.

How is that going to make his a more compelling story?

It’s not.

Also, how is that going to make him more heroic?

I won’t.

So, another issue out and read and reviewed and I still don’t see it for them.

And, by the way, I’m not the only one of the FanGirls. We touched on the issue in our latest podcast. You should really check it out.

But, we’ll be back next month to see if this gets any more palatable.

Or any less intolerable.

Peace out.

 

 

Gal Gadot signs a three picture deal

Gal Gadot who will be playing Wonder Woman in the upcoming Batman vs Superman movie, has signed a three picture deal with Warner Brothers.

They have confirmed it will include a Justice League movie and a Wonder Woman standalone movie. It looks like we will be seeing more of Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman in the future.

Michael Wilkinson talks about the Wonder Woman costume

Michael Wilkinson has been asked about the costume design for the Wonder Woman in the upcoming Batman vs. Superman movie.

“It’s so important to get her right. She really deserves to be presented on-screen in her full glory. So what I do is I look at the history of how the character has been presented on the big-screen, and the small-screen, and in comic books, and graphic novels. We process it all. Then we kind of put that aside and work out what is right for our film, for the cinematic universe that our director Zack Snyder is putting together. We try and create a Wonder Woman that’s relevant for today’s audiences.”

This definitely helps confirm that they are planning on doing a Justice League movie because there would be no other reason to get her costume right otherwise.  I am happy that they are looking at all of her incarnations in order to create the costume.  I know many of the fans are trying to figure out what costume they are going to use for her.

Wilkinson was asked if it was realistic to have her fighting crime in her typical costume.

“Absolutely! I mean, you just have to look at the gladiators from ancient Rome, they did their thing in little loin clothes and a shield….It works for Thor, it works for 300, so let’s see what happens.”

I am not sure how I feel about that comment, while I appreciate that he is not trying to limit Wonder Woman because she is a girl.  The costumes and characters that are mentioned are all male.  At the same time Wonder Woman is female and let’s be fair women are looked at differently when it comes to fashion.  While those costumes, work for the male characters it might not work for a female character.

I guess we will have to wait and see.